Wednesday, January 8, 2014

Gimme a "B!"

Today's post is slightly off-topic. Oh wait...that's right, I don't really have a set topic on this here blog; I just blabber on about whatever I want. Oh the beauty of the American blog. I should say--today's topic is non-house related. I want to tell you about a meeting I had. A meeting with Ryder's first grade teacher, Mrs. Herr.

First of all, I wanna preface this post with this statement: we're a Christian family. That may mean different things to different people, but basically we're Bible-believin', God-lovin', redeemed by the blood (preach it!) people. People that don't curse. Or shouldn't curse (or cuss, for you Southerners). I mean, I let one fly every now and again if I'm either really ticked off (it happens...and I'll fully blame it on my Irish heritage) or when I'm joking. I won't give you any examples here lest my super conservative friends gasp in horror, but sometimes it's just funny. Funny to me anyway. Mitch doesn't think so. He never curses. Ever. (although I do think he thinks it's funny sometimes too)

"Speak life" is one phrase that is used often in our house (it's taken from a tobyMac's an explanation). I'll yell say to Ryder in the other room after he calls Bryce a butt-head, "RYDER! Are you speaking life?"
"Noooo," is his reply. Pretty much always. 
Not really sure why I just included that in this post...maybe to remind MYSELF. more thing--I can't say for 100% certainty that I've NEVER cursed in front of our kids, 'cause I may have while telling Mitch about some big-"butt" deal I just scored at the thrift store that day, but I for sure don't curse out of anger in front of them. Those special moments are usually reserved for Mitch in private or on rare occasions, other adult members of our families. Ahh...can't ya feel the love?

Okay, now that you have some background information, let me tell you about this meeting I had with Mrs. Herr. So I walk into Ryder's classroom, sit down and start chatting away with his teacher about how he's doing. I get a "thumb's up" for all the usual stuff like participation, his reading/math skills, interaction with others, etc. All was fine and dandy. And I was feelin' like a pretty good parent that has a brainiac angel for a child. But then Mrs. Herr said,

We did have one incident though.
Me: Okay
teacher: Ryder called someone a "B".
Me: Um...okaaaay...a B?? (at this point I was thinking butt, or boob at the very worst...or blobby, which is a Bryce word)

I made his teacher say it 'cause I had no clue what she was talking about. And she said it. And it rhymes with my husband's first name. And I was horrified. And what took place after that was what always takes place when a parent is confronted with something like this: I said, "I don't know where he got THAT from!"

But honestly, people, I DIDN'T know where he got it from. I could totally read Mrs. Herr's brain right then and there and it had a big "YEAH RIGHT, HERTZLER" written right across it.

I mean, really, isn't that what all the parents say? Even the parents who are yelling profanities across the store at their kids?? Then when little Johnny is calling someone a fill-in-the-blank, Mom's reaction is the exact same as mine, "I don't know where he got that from!" 

Man...did I feel like a loser that day. Sheesh. Well come to find out when I later (calmly) asked Ryder about it, that some kid told him to say it and then that little devil told on Ry for saying it. Ahh...boys, darling heathen boys. After Mrs. Herr talked to him about it, she knew Ryder didn't know what he said or what it meant, so we were off the hook. But she still wanted to tell me about it. And I'm glad she did. I can laugh about it now. Even if she still thinks ours is a profanity-filled DIY-lovin' home. ;)

Just thought you guys might appreciate that little story. Has anything like that ever happened to you? Come on, spill it. You'll make me feel better. One thing's for sure--I don't think I'll ever forget the day when Ry called someone a B


  1. Our oldest, 6 1/2 year old boy, said sh$@ at church, womp womp... He told us that he made the word up- clearly he had no clue (yay phonics!). Never a dull moment ;)

    1. Ha! Love it! Seriously, you never know what's going to come out of their mouths;)

  2. One of my children, who shall remain nameless, sat on a boy and gave him a giant wedgie when (s)he was in Kindergarten. I have no idea where that came from, and I was MORTIFIED when the teacher told me. She was in shock too, because that is the one and only problem we ever had that year. I think my face is still turning red as I type this. Mortified! Kids make life interesting, that's for sure!

    1. Now that's just stinkin' funny. Oh my word! I wish I were a fly on the wall that day!! So funny!!

  3. Poor Ryder, he was tricked into being bad. One of the battle cries for Auburn is War Damn Eagle! A couple of weeks ago after a big win one of our friend's son's (pre k) teachers (got that?!) had on an Auburn shirt. He walked up to her and yelled WAR DAMN EAGLE! So proud. Poor kid had no idea what he was saying. His parents were so embarased.

    1. Ha! "Well that's what we say..." (I can hear the kid now)

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